Suspension- a Microfiction Tale

Suspension

“Ruby, what did I say about eating paste?”

“Sorry, Ms. Graham.”

“That’s the third time today. You’ve ruined another outside lesson. Now we’ll all have to go inside for more paste. Except you. Do a time out at the swing.”

“But the wolf is hungry!”

“Wolves don’t eat paste. Pretend time is over. Now go!”

#

Thanks to Jezri’s Nightmares for this microfiction challenge!

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Gooseberry Fool, an April Fools’ Day Recipe

Gooseberry (Cranberry Jelly) Fool

Here’s a super-duper easy recipe you can make for April Fools’ Day, Easter, Valentine’s Day, or even your birthday.

It’s a modern vegan version of the traditional English Gooseberry Fool. All you need are 4 containers of O’Soy Soygurt (vanilla flavor) and a can of gooseberries. Alternately, you can substitute a can of cranberries, or if you’re really in a bind, a can of cranberry jelly (which is what I did). You’ll also need a stove, a pan, a stirring tool, a large bowl, and serving glasses with spoons (those those last 2 items are optional).

Gooseberry Fool Ingredients

Dump the gooseberries or cranberries or cranberry jelly into the pan. You’ll probably have to scrape the insides of the can with the stirring tool to get most of the goop out. Look to see if you have whole berries in the pan. If you do, mash them with the stirring tool or your fist. Turn the stove on low, making sure the burner you turn on is the one under your pan. Stirring frequently, reduce the liquid in the pan (via heating) until you have something with the consistency of pudding. This could take up to an hour, depending on how liquidy your pan ingredient is. (I said this was easy, not necessarily quick.) Once your pan ingredient is pudding-like, let it cool completely. Then dump the soygurt and the berry stuff into a large bowl. Again, use the stirring tool to scrape the goop. Stir. Pour or spoon into the serving glasses.

And now I shall gift my loyal readers with a Tom Green video. Happy April Fools’ Day!

Still here? OK. This is me emerging from a long winter of hibernation, immediately before I made the faux Gooseberry Fool. Yikes. Don’t let this happen to you. Make the Gooseberry Fool – faux or otherwise –  before it’s too late!

Fool

Still haven’t had enough foolishness? Check out my last blog post and get in on the action! Contribute via the magic of the internet as much or as little as you like to an experimental collaborative mini movie!

Wanna Make a Mini Movie?

IHeartThe1900Bimbo

Motivated by a couple men in gorilla suits (AKA Christopher Gronlund and Shawn Kupfer), I decided to dig out my WIP for a mini movie about a work-at-home phone sex operator who gets a call from an ET.

Focus Features via Media.Philly.com

I’ll give you a minute to let that sink in.

OK.

This is 1950’s monster movie camp meets 2010’s online democratized content. Now while I fully admit that this mini movie idea is awesome as vegan chocolate sauce, I also fully admit that I, as an artist, am only 1 person (2 if you count my impromptu amateur videographer husband), I have little movie-making know-how, and I don’t have access to a movie set. So, this is where you come in, brave, creative, online content democratization enthusiast! Wanna get in the spirit of artistic collaboration and contribute to a fun, freaky, sci fi mini movie?

Here’s how this will work:

1. Anybody (18+) can help do this! You may contribute, via email, as little or as much as you’d like to any of the following, provided the contribution is original, and follows the premise of the movie:

a. a written scene in the movie script

b. an actual filmed scene in the movie

c. film editing, special effects, graphics and titles

2. If you contribute useable content, your contribution – in full or in part – will end up in the movie.

3. If you contribute, you will be credited in the movie credits (unless you want to remain anonymous).

4. The movie, when complete, will be available for public viewing on youtube, and will be submitted to Stoneham Cinema.

5. There’s no monetary compensation for contributing, this is an amateur artistic collaboration, and an experiment in content democratization.

6. Production and final editing decisions are reserved for me. (Somebody’s gotta do it.)

Need some inspiration to help you be a brave, creative mini movie collaborator? Check out these gorilla suited links to democratized content sources. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

So, now that your head is spinning, wanna contribute to a fun, goofy, non-professional, experimental, indie mini movie? (hint – “Heck, yeah!”) Email me for more details.

*****

BTW, check out this flash fiction anthology. You may have read one of the included stories here first!